Gate 10 · The Behavior of the Self

What it is like

For you, being yourself is a daily practice, not a slogan, and it shows in the little things. Explaining how you live can take more energy than the living itself.

When someone close has it

This person lives their own way and usually doesn't need permission for it. Take them as they are, without asking for reasons.

A question for today

Where am I being myself today, and where am I fitting in with what others expect?

The six lines of gate 10

1. Line 1 · Plain Step

   Being yourself starts here with an ordinary step, taken the way it naturally comes to you. You need no grand declarations, it is enough to know where you stand and walk your own way without extra decoration. In daily life it shows in the simplicity with which you say no or choose your own way of doing things. When the ground feels unsteady, it is easy to look for a rule in others instead of trusting how you simply walk.

2. Line 2 · Level Road

   This line behaves in its own way without effort, like someone walking a level road with no hurry. You do best in quiet, away from the noise, and others notice your way of being anyway and draw you into things you do not chase. You do not have to practise it, it is simply how you walk. Sometimes the call from outside comes at a bad time and it is hard for you to step out of the quiet, even when it is worth it.

3. Line 3 · Tiger's Tail

   Here being yourself is tested in practice, often where it is easy to step on someone's tail. You go your own way before you can see everything, and only the world's reaction shows what was courage and what was too much. From every such stumble you take something concrete about yourself. When certainty runs ahead of sight, it is easy to step into a role bigger than yours and pay more for it than the situation asks.

4. Line 4 · Wary Footing

   This line shows how to stay yourself among the people you know without breaking the relationship. You sense when to say your piece directly and when to wait a moment and look around, and that attentiveness lets those close to you accept your way of being. You influence them by example in small situations, at the table or at work. Sometimes there is too much caution and you wait for a better moment so long that your view is never spoken.

5. Line 5 · Resolute Stride

   Here your way of being becomes, for others, a model of a solution. People see you walking with certainty and hope you will show them how to live on their own terms in their own affairs. Your resolve is often practical and can be carried over to other people's situations. When expectations part ways with what you actually do, it is easy to become the target of disappointment, and holding your course then has its price.

6. Line 6 · The Road Behind

   This line looks at its behaviour from a distance, like someone looking back over the whole road walked. Over the years you explain less about how you live, and more of it shows in how you do it. Others learn from you without a lecture, simply by watching your day. Sometimes it is hard to come down from that height to ordinary matters, and distance begins to look like drifting away from people.

The centre of this gate

• G

Channels through gate 10

• 10–20 · Awakening
• 10–57 · Perfected Form
• 10–34 · Exploration